I Am...

I find that I don't post as often as I think about posting...so many words and thought swirling around in my mind, that I'm never sure I'll do them justice, bring them to life the way I want them to come across...so many connections, mixed emotions, contradictions....will you understand what I'm trying to say?  This year, I am telling myself to relax a bit and just put the words out there.  I've set a goal to do this at least twice a month, hopefully more often.  It might not be pretty or poetic, but I'm happy to be here among friends, so thanks for reading!

I sat down on the morning of January 1st and watched the documentary "I Am" by Tom Shadyac.  http://www.iamthedoc.com/
It sums up a lot of what I've been feeling and thinking and what seems to be a rising consciousness in our world - we are all connected.  Each one of our actions has an impact on the world....what are our actions doing?  Are they protecting, preserving, sharing, caring?  It was a good way to start the year, thinking about who "I Am"......

That's how I started this blog, trying to think about the actions I was taking and see if I could inspire and be inspired by others.  Who am I?  I guess that's the universal question.  Some of us know much earlier than others.  Another connection to 'I Am'...Mattie Stepanek.  A young man who wanted to be known as "a poet, a peacemaker, and a philosopher who played."  Wise beyond his years, inspirational beyond his life here on earth.  He wrote a poem entitled "I Am/Shades of Life" and Billy Gilman recorded a song using his lyrics.  Mattie's mission was peace.  He thought a lot about what each individual's impact was in the world and knew that it meant a lot.  You can read more about him at http://www.mattieonline.com .  I had the great honor of meeting his mom, Jeni, in September when we traveled to Maryland to visit a park built in Mattie's honor.  I took my family there because I have 3 sons who I hope will be inspired and encouraged by Mattie....One of them is named after him.  Jeni Stepanek continues to spread her son's vision of peace.  When you read the 'Pathways to Peace' publication that she has created, you will see the incredible wisdom of her son:  http://www.mattieonline.com/brochures/Pathways_to_Peace_brochure_NEW.pdf

Who am I?  I think it takes some slowing down to ponder that question.  It seems to swirl around in my head a bit louder now that I am 3 months away from turning 40.  Age is just a number, but milestones have a way of making us slow down to think about things.  I have a son who will be a teenager in 1 1/2 years.  How can that be when it doesn't seem that long ago that I first became really aware of the fact that my actions impact another, when I was 'eating for 2' and wondering why we don't all eat as though we are eating for 2.  Not that long since, as a new mom, I moved into a new townhouse with my husband and infant son who would not sleep unless he was upright (which I later found out was due to a milk intolerance, passed on through breast milk since I was drinking lots of milk).  Because of this, he slept in his carseat, right on the ground, on the newly installed wall-to-wall carpet that 'would be perfect for a baby to crawl around on.'  The same carpet that I believe gave him asthma.  Nope, it's not scientific, just a mother's intuition....another one of my gut feelings.  After almost 40 years, I'm finally starting to trust my gut.  To continue to question who I am.  To try to make sense out of this gift we call life....

It's such a beautiful thing.

I have so many things I want to write about....some you might like and some you might not.  I welcome the agreement, the disagreement and everything in between.

Thank you for sharing my journey and stopping by to share yours, too!

“In so many ways, we are the same.
Our differences are unique treasures.
We have, we are, are mosaic of gifts,
to nurture, to offer, to accept.”
— Mattie J.T. Stepanek

I Am.....Someone who considers you a brother or a sister.
I Am.....Looking for ways to be a better person so that my positive changes have a positive impact on you.
I Am.....Not perfect.
I Am.....Grateful.
I Am.....Ready.

I Am....


Are you?